De-Blobbing Our Relationships

Living outside the pressure to change ourselves or control others.

Walruses huddled together on an ice floe.

So much of you is negotiable in the moment.

A third drink doesn’t seem unwise if a friend is ordering one. A teenager’s favorite band might become terrible if their mother starts dancing to the music. A spouse’s effort to exercise more might have you jogging alongside them or feeling terrible about yourself.

None of this is good or bad. It is simply worth our attention. We makes changes based on who’s in the room. Dial up the stress, and these adjustments becomes more automatic.

The goal isn’t to avoid all influence, but to be more in charge ourselves. To find the space between changing to please others and changing others to calm self.

So I want to give you eight examples of how people start to de-blob themselves in all kinds of relationships, to operate more thoughtfully as an individual.